Wrinkled Facebook

When I got on Facebook a few weeks ago, I found myself stunned at how quickly I was back in touch with people from all corners of my life.

From junior high pals I haven't seen in decades to hard-partying old L.A. coworkers to friends I see on at least a semi-regular basis, I found clusters of people to reconnect with, or more importantly, they somehow found me ( a function of the site that is both exciting and a little bit disquieting. Seriously, if you've ever had an obsessed ex or a semi-stalker, Facebook is like coming out of witness protection and testifying at a grand jury .)

But the most interesting side-effect of setting up my Facebook account was that I felt current and even a little relevant, a task that isn't so easy for a 36-year-old married father of two who considers a trip to BJ's as his version of "clubbing."

It's not like I'm anachronistic at heart, afraid to embrace modern advances. I've got my HDTV, my two-tuner DVR, a web-enabled cell phone, and this blog is actually already the second one I've had. At worst, I'm stuck in 2004, and on a good day, I party like it's 2007.

But using a social networking site was a big step because in some way, it's embracing a new way of connecting with people. Instead of calling or writing or sending carrier pigeons, it's more like broadcasting a radio signal about yourself and seeing who transmits back; Ham radio with unlimited range and no call numbers.

I've noticed everyone uses Facebook differently. Some people's profiles are like looking at a schoolmate's folder to see what stickers and bands are on it. Others are perfectly crafted summaries of who they are and what they do. And then, there are those who use the site as an ever-evolving holiday card, with new pictures of themselves, their kids, and pets posted frequently.

Some people seem to collect as many friends as possible, regardless of whether they're people they really are trying to stay in touch with, while others clearly put some thought into who they are adding, making sure everyone has a context.

I slowly started to evolve my own page, deciding that I wanted it to be a place people could "check in" on me and the family, but also a window for reaching the blog and keeping people abreast of when I had new column or some such self-promotion to pimp. As I did so, I reached out to to people... okay, younger people... to give me an idea of how it all worked, and that's when I got a message back from Benjy, the younger brother of one of my good friends from college.

"Facebook is everywhere. I have it because my interns have it. I actually think I'm 5 years too old (minimum) to use it, which makes you 9 years or so too old, but that's purely academic."

Cyber-ouch.

I started thinking of all the other things I'm nine years too old for: auditioning for American Idol... my prime as a major league hitter... being considered a "young rising star" in any field.

But still, I'm going to keep Facebooking (if that's a verb) because most of the people I'm in touch with are too old for it too. Who knows... maybe eventually there will be a "too old for Facebook" group on my Facebook profile, and it'll be the biggest group of online friends I have.